Horoscopes = Stupid predictions??

Do you believe in horoscopes? Eventhough I do read articles and browse websites on horoscopes, I still doubt whether it can be trusted. I started to get obsessed with this horoscope thingy when I was only 12.

One day, I went to a so-called auntie’s house to help her baby sit her monkeys battalions kids. When those bunch of nuisance were finally asleep, I discovered a very thick, bright red coloured book. The title is, ‘Horoscopes: The mirror of our lives’. Being the curious kid I was, I read the book. Its first page was like a user manual. It describes in detailed on how to use that damn-thick book. In the first few pages, it clearly stated that the book is about the horoscopes of the past, present and future of individuals. The predictions in that book are based on the birth date, birth time, day of birth, sexual identity and much more personal information of individuals.

So, I flipped through the pages till I found the page on my horoscope. At first, I read what it says about my past. I was shocked to find all those things written inside the past and present columns were exactly the same as what I went through. The characteristics part also describes me in detailed, about my traits and attitude. When I read about what it has predicted about my future, I had combination feelings. I didn’t know whether I should be happy or sad.

My future according to the Horoscope book of predictions, it says that I:

1. Might become very successful in my career and might possibly hold a very high post

2. Might become very attractive and sexy when I reach my 20’s eventhough I was a damn ugly bitch during school days.

3. Might attract a lot of men during my middle age (I’m in my 20’s now, so can also be considered as middle aged already right? =P)

4. Might be quite rich with a lot of assets or properties.

5. Might have 2 men in my life.

6. Might live until the age of 71.

So, what do you think? Of course I felt great and happy with prediction number 1 to 4 but what about the other two?? Who the hell are those two men in my life? BLAH!! I don’t want to have two husbands! I can’t accommodate two bananas at the same time ok. Whatever it is, I don’t even have any potential banana man in my life right now. So how possible it is to have two men in my life?? Could it be death or divorce that made the two men prediction? *Choy!!! Touch wood*

As for the other prediction, I don’t think the author of that horoscope book has the ability to predict when he himself is going to die also. WTF? He predicted that I’m going to die at 71?? …But 71 is still considered young these days. I wouldn’t want to die young! I still have lots of things to do…err, like becoming a multimillionaire, travel everywhere or anywhere, sit down and shake legs everyday, getting laid married, have adorable monkeys kids, etc. etc. etc.

Over-obsession with this horoscope thingy can make someone go crazy. I’ve got a friend who bumped into a fortuneteller when she went shopping recently. That kaypo man suddenly stopped her and told her weird things.

“Miss ah, from your face, I can predict your future. You must believe me. No matter how, I must tell you before it’s too late.”

“Who are you?? Predict my future???”

“I’m a fortuneteller. From my predictions, no matter how, you MUST find a man and marry him by the age of 24 or 25. If not, you’ll be single forever!

“HUH????!!”

So my always-paranoid friend really believes him and went hunting for Mr. Right but until now, she’s still single (I think so…). Well, if it’s really true, then this dear friend of mine only has about 3 to 4 years to go to get hitched! So, do you really believe in horoscopes? My question is, “Can we really trust or believe that horoscope thingy?” But I don’t want to have two men or die at 71!!! *sheesh*