Blooming

I had a chat with a somewhat superstitious friend recently and our conversation made me realized something. As both of us were born under the same zodiac sign, she excitedly told me...

"Hey! Guess what? This time of the year is damn cool. It is predicted that we should be attracting a lot of guys! It is believed that we will fall in and out of love easily. Are you dating anyone lately?"

Her statement made me ponder for a moment. Well, I can't deny I do enjoy getting lots of attention lately. Hehe...but then again, maybe what she said was right. I think I had a crush on a guy about a month ago, and two weeks ago, it was a different one and then now, I'm thinking of another one. Bleh. Is this a bad thing or what?

Anyways, I guess this is the nicest part of being single. You have lots of dates and get to enjoy the much needed attention without getting bored. Hehehe. Damn. I'm a goner! I went clubbing with the whole gang of engineers last night and that guy was really cute!!! Gahhh...

Buried under a mountain of dollar notes

Out of the blue, the topic was brought up. I was aware of this issue and I knew I had to face this problem...but I didn't know this person would bring this issue up so soon. And this topic suddenly makes me feel very, very small...as though I've been buried alive, under a mountain of dollar notes.

How many times do you hear this, "Money is not everything"? I agree that this could be true but without money, you lose everything. Think about it. I've also heard of this..."Even with lots of money, you won't be happy". I'm not sure how true is that but I personally feel like I'm dying...slowly, not physically but emotionally. I'm not complaining about being underpaid or having to juggle my personal financial issues, but I seriously cannot tolerate certain things that person says.

Why must those questions be repeated umpteen times? It is really VERY suffocating to think of this matter each time when it is brought up. I know I obviously can't avoid it, but can't you give me some space to take a breather? I hate it very much when you ask questions that I myself don't even have the answers yet. All I need is some time to think over this matter, and to carefully plan the path. Can it be really that bad? I've only started work not long ago and here you are, attacking me with difficult questions without even considering my feelings.

I'm afraid all the things you said and did have actually turned me into a real bitch, as in someone who sees money as everything! A money-eyed bitch....and I obviously hate myself for changing into a person like that. Whatever you said made me recalled back about that self-made millionaire I once dated. Was it really a wrong choice that I ended the relationship? I was really thinking...maybe, just maybe...I wouldn't be facing this sort of problems IF I hadn't ended the whole thing. But then again, being who I really am, I would rather die than to depend on a rich man. I guess I just have to push myself forward and suffer this phase of life before I could prove myself to someone and shut the mouth.

It seems that nothing can be done. I could only survive on two words for the time being. I have to force myself to tolerate and be independent, no matter how. All I need is time...

Study loan equals debts??

It's surprising that I managed to wake up early today since I slept at 4am last night. Anyway, maybe....maybe there's this thing that is really bugging me.

I was chatting with a younger colleague last night when he told me about his study plans. He's leaving for UK in August to get a Degree and his passion has in a way reminded me of what I've always wanted.

"Wow. You're going to UK? ...it's expensive there. You must be damn rich huh?" I asked.

"Nahh...I'm not rich lah. I applied for a loan of 8% for 5 years. You could do that too." He explained.

And his line of "you could do that too" has been repeating itself non-stop since last night. Is it really worth it to get a loan just to fulfill my dreams? In case you didn't know, 97% of all personal financing and investment books (like those written by Robert Kiyosaki and Warren Buffet) tells you that getting a loan is the stupidest thing one could get for himself. The theory is similar to this, before earning from your investments, you already made yourself fall into the debts category? That sounds a bit stupid.

Bleh...I was really thinking about this. To fulfill my childhood dreams and passion (before I become an old, ugly auntie), I might need to work my ass out to pay back the loan later on. Can I make it?

Well, of course there are other alternatives.
1) Get the MBA elsewhere. *thinks of the ever-prestigious Uni in the neighbouring country*
2) Work my ass out, become a slave and work OT everyday, work part-time, sell lots of bullshits and do ANYTHING to earn enough money in 2-3 years time.
3) Business and investments.
4) Find a super rich guy (most likely a bald, old and butt ugly man) and get sponsored (OOPS, this option is totally out! Yours truly is not that cheap. I don't think I could stick to someone like that and I obviously hate to be controlled. So this is out!)
5) Forget about this dream. (Oh no!) ....and regret your choice of not furthering studies when you were still young.

Gahhh.... I doubt getting a loan is a good option....but have I got any other choices?

Working alongside idiots

The title of this post tells you clearly that yours truly would love to grill a few idiots alive, if she could really do it.

Working at the front line of a company isn't really that easy actually. Come to think of it, is this still the so-called blessing in disguise experience? I've never really thought of working at a department like this, but somehow, I guess I need to really blend in well while I get along and work with/for idiots....but I can't deny that I was thinking of something else. "Should I stay after completing my four months internship? Should I leave before the confirmation date?" "Should I treasure the first few months as a full-time permanent employee whilst my course mates struggle like hell to kill time?"

Anyway, a few idiots stole my mood away today.

The bloody irritating and busybody US counterpart
There's this guy (with a girl's name) from our US subsidiary who doesn't know how to respect people. Each time he sends an email over, he will only talk to a higher authority. Even when his email was addressed to yours truly, he will never mention my name. And the most annoying part was he loves to use font size 15 for all his emails. Everything we do, he will escalate. He knows nuts, yet he supports whatever our customers say. I only have one sentence to describe this guy. He's one fcuking idiot who doesn't know manners and could possibly be a faggot since he loves to kaypo about other people's things.

The "I don't know" idiots
Everything I ask them, they will only say "I don't know" even though it's their job. If they don't know anything, who else is supposed to know? Angels? God? These idiots are better off at home, sucking their thumbs than being a zombie at work!

The forgetful old man
This guy holds a high post but he's almost going brain dead. Anything important you tell him today, he will forget it by tomorrow...or maybe the next minute. And the problem is, other people always believe in the things he says. So, telling him something equals to nothing. I might as well swallow in everything I need to tell him.

The "I'm waiting for your instructions" pig heads
Talking to or asking this type of people on certain things makes me vomit blood. They are forever waiting for someone to instruct them. So next time, when there's no one to remind them on when to pangsai (shit) or eat, they won't do it at all.

The breathing-behind-my-neck customer
This customer loves to hunt for yours truly. Each time I see him/her (there are two of them from the same company), I will have to attend to their impossible requests ASAP. One would always call me non-stop and place stupid orders, where the parts/items must be sent the following day or on the same particular day (which is obviously impossible and stupid). The other is a domineering bitch who never listens but I bet she was a graduate from the Super-Fake Acting School.

There are a few other idiots but these idiots I mentioned above are enough to make my day. Bloody hell! I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning, dragged myself to work, had so many stupid things to do and these numb nuts spoiled the rest of my day. Grrr...

Bad day

Do you remember what day is today? Gosh! It's Friday the 13th!! I've never been the very superstitious type, or maybe...just a little. But, since today coincides with the so-called bad luck day, I really had a bad day at work today.

Hmmm...long story.

Anyways, since I just got back from work and I'm quite pissed off with a few peeps, I shall end this post here before I explode this place.

Oh by the way, I'm going to Cameron tomorrow!

*Off to pack bags*

Time to get busy

It was about 3pm but there was no phone calls, no emails, nothing. I was quite happy as I could do anything I wanted and I could chat with anyone on MSN and Skype without worrying about the on-going projects.

My senior has always reminded me on something that I could hardly believe it. He will always say this, "We will always get busy when it's around 4 to 4.30pm. People will call non-stop. Our mailbox will explode. Trust me on this..."

This time it happened, and I believe his words now. After receiving a call at about 4.15pm, I was so busy that I couldn't even find the time to go to the washroom! Other than calls, I received lots of emails demanding follow ups as well. Without realizing how fast time flies, it was already 8pm when my stomach made noise. Aihhh....really no life!!

Today is my first day handling all the projects by myself without my senior. He has gone on a holiday, starting from today. So he left a big pile of work and also the influenza virus to me! Ohhh....bless me for his big gift...the bloody virus! Grrr...

So I'm expected to be super-busy for the next one week. Heh! He better get me something from where he has gone to! Hehe.

Blind date #1

2 girls, 12 guys, 1 blind date.

Yesterday night, my colleague and I went crazy. We (only 2 of us as the other one was sick) finally agreed to join/meet up with the bunch of crazy mechanical engineers from plant 1 (of the same company) after chatting in the same chatroom for over a month.

Like I said, it was truly a crazy gathering as we have never met any of those guys before. It took them a month's time to find out our identity, where lots of spies were sent to check on almost everything about us, e.g. how we look like, our hp numbers, our real/full names, what/which car we drive, where we stay, etc.

Initially, it felt weird but after a while, the so-called blind date was considered a success. We blended in easily into their ever-crazy topics. The only funny part was, we (the 2 girls) had a difficult time identifying and matching the guys with the nicknames used in the chatroom. Looks like it's our turn to send some spies over to check on their backgrounds. HAha.

Working in a male dominated industry....

....can be cool and also scary at the same time!

The other day, one of the big structures (for a machine) was found with non-conforming dimensions (or in layman's term, measurements). As it was already 85% completed and each structure costs about RM70k, everyone rushed to the production floor to check on it. I was there with my senior, and also many other engineers.

Within split seconds, all the guys climbed up a 5 meter machine to check on that structure. Luckily, I wore pants on that day. So I joined what the others did and I realized something at that time.

"Gosh! Am I the only lady involved in this project?"

I could sense a strong smell of gender discrimination when the other older engineers showed some kind of facial expression that made yours truly uncomfortable. They probably need more time to accept a lady in their team.

Other than that, working in a male dominated industry can be quite cool. Wanna know why? Haha. I'm obviously enjoying and getting a much deserved attention from the younger engineers. I only deal with some of them (as we're in the same team, handling similar projects) but I got to know many other engineers from another plant through some of my colleagues. That helps a lot as it makes my journey at work much smoother.

So, here are some of the obvious pros and cons of working in a male dominated industry.

Pros:
- You get to see and know LOTS of guys.
- You get to learn things from the guys, especially the more experienced ones.
- You get LOTS of attention from your male counterparts. Hehehe.

Cons:
- You need more time to convince the older or experienced ones that you're capable of doing something.
- You feel very "small" at times, as you're often surrounded by guys, big machines, and lots of heavy structures, jigs and fixtures!
- You have to fight against people's general perception that girls are "soft" and "useless"...especially in a working environment like mine.